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Friday, January 30, 2004
If You Can't Join 'Em, Beat 'Em
Remember Martha Bork's crusade against Augusta National last year? Yes, I know, very 2003. But I suddenly realized that Ms. Bork's going about getting women admitted to Augusta National the entirely wrong way. Now, I haven't been able to find specific information about Augusta National, but it seems that there are two ways of becoming a member of the golf club: 1. Filling out an application, which is then reviewed by a bunch of stuffy old guys who give you bonus points for knowing everyone else in the club, being really rich, etc. 2. Winning the Masters Golf Tournament. Now, Michelle Wie is probably the best golfer of our generation; I have a feeling that she'll be threatening Tiger Woods in a few years. If she were to win the Masters Golf Tournament, Augusta National would have to give her the green jacket*, keys to the club, etc. And if they refused? I'm sure plenty of fine golf courses would jump at the chance of holding the Masters. Besides, do you really want to mess with someone who's holding a Big Bertha and knows how to use it? *Two hours, everyone's at the seventeenth hole, a corporate guy: "Hey! Call a tailor--it looks like the girl might win this thing! We've got to get one of these jackets altered, and fast."
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